Sometimes im still in denial.

I cant believe that someone who said they loved me would eventually hurt me physically or mentally.

Not once aswel but over and over and over and over and over and over.

The mind is a confusing loophole how I manage to go back or forgive someone is beyond me because I know the majority of people I have met have told me they would never forgive…

You’ve poked me prodded me in the face you’ve hit my belonging shouted stomped slammed doors youve cornered me from the children youve sworn at me called me names, you’ve trashed my home the walls, you’ve called me names blamed me for your hurt. You’ve followed me stalked me harassed me. You’ve shouted at me when I was crying you’ve laughed at me when was crying you’ve left me in agony in the bed on my own, you’ve ignored my medical problems and you left me to enter a hospital alone in an ambulance 4 days after giving birth. Left me abandoned alone suicidal. Controlled me.

I think I’ve been abused.

But sometimes I blame myself.